Just about every guy knows that confidence with women is absolutely critical when it comes to success with dating.  But how can a guy become more confident to attract women in the first place?  That is the trick subject of this article.

Confidence with Women – The Chicken and the Egg

So what if you haven’t had much success with women up till now?  Some pick up artists out there will recommend that you “fake it till you make it.”  They recommend that you pretend to be macho and sometimes even lie and tell totally made up stories to women when you’re first getting started.

If you’re okay with this, then that’s fine, but personally it’s not my style.  I believe that in order to have confidence with women, you don’t need to lie.  Although it is true that having confidence will make you more successful with women, you should not have to lie in order to convey confidence.  That will only make you more insecure as you are constantly worried about being “found out.”

The Real Secret to Confidence with Women

Instead of lying to create a fake appearance of being a player or whatever, understand that this isn’t the true nature of confidence.

Confidence doesn’t just come from looking like a cool guy.  Confidence is actually being completely comfortable and accepting of yourself as you are.

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This means that you don’t feel ashamed of any part of your life.  Can you imagine feeling completely confident telling a girl that you’re shy and haven’t asked a girl out in over a year?

You can easily do this with complete confidence if you simply embrace the fact and no longer see it something to be ashamed of or embarrassed by.

Developing the Mindset for Natural Confidence with Women

So how do you get to this relaxed and confident state of mind?  Well, first you need to realize that most of your insecurities come from worrying too much about what other people (especially women) think about you.

I’m going to be honest.  Most people you talk to on a daily basis, whether it be out at a bar or at a friend’s house party aren’t thinking about you.  They’re not busy analyzing you and wondering if you’re cool or not.

They are actually worrying about themselves.  In fact, most people spend a lot of time worrying about how others see them.  This is especially true of women.  Think about it!  Women spend so much time worrying if they look good or worrying if they have a reputation for being “too easy.”

If you just go up to some random girl and fully accept everything about yourself, treating every single thing that you might consider a shortcoming as something that is completely normal, you will come across as extremely confident and attractive to her.  She’ll be too busy worried about what you think about her that you could even tell her something like “I’ve never even been on a date before.”

Now that is complete confidence with women.  The real secret is to just stop thinking about yourself and get out of your head.  Just let go, have fun and remember that people really don’t pay as much attention to you as you probably think.  Remind yourself that they are often more worried about their own self-image than about judging you.  So relax and simply enjoy meeting women.